Fog is NOT Cloudy

This morning, I drove to work in a thick, grey blanket of fog.

Let me show you......

Here's what I saw driving down the road today.......

Here's what I typically see.......

BIG DIFFERENCE. I think typically we think of fog as clouding our vision - blocking us from what we want to see. Well, it occurred to me that I was actually a better driver this morning because I wasn't distracted by all of the scenery, businesses, cars, police clocking speeders, or traffic up ahead. I simply had my complete attention focused on what was happening right in front of my face. I thought about this all the way to work on my 40 minute drive.

It's so easy to get wrapped up in life responsibilities, the mundane work at work, time stuck in traffic, finances and bills, and so on. Especially now with Christmas, and the holidays in general, it feels like sometimes it engulf me into a giddy spirit. One of "Everything is so wonderful, so great" when it may not be, and may suggest for me to go crazy to become the perfect Giada, Martha, Tori, Kate, Jackie O [insert your own holiday idol of perfection], ensuring I have the perfect holiday decor that rivals any home magazine, and making every effort to visit every Santa/snow machine around town. It can be stressful, and I can stuff that feeling down inside like we did to the turkey and the stuffing on Thanksgiving last month as it secretly eats away at my happiness. These distractions may blind me. I may lose sight of what is actually important - things that are right in front of my face.

This all reminds me of this Words of Wisdom post a few weeks ago.

Always, and especially with the holidays, life should be about family. About friends. About relationships. About blessings. About celebrating faith, God, Jesus. [Santa, step aside]

 I pledge that I will not let distractions get in the way of all that I have, love, and am blessed with. I will see the wonderful family, friends, and faith that are and have always been right there close beside me. I will look at everything that life is offering right now, and embrace it, wrapping it up in a big grey blanket of soft fluffy clouds cotton.

Bring on the fog!

Inbetween

There are so many stages of our lives that we accept different roles, values, and personas. I'm sure I can say that for most of us, a memorable one was the "tween" years (am I using this trendy phrase correctly??). It's that awkward time when your "not a girl, not yet a woman" (thank you Britney Spears). Well I think I've found the next "tween" years of my life. I'm stuck in the middle of that lively, young college student and professional adult. I look about my age, maybe a little young, but I'm sure I'll appreciate that later on in life. Right now, I just feel like I'm not really taken seriously and it has nothing to do with my work product or degrees I have.

I work at a University, and at 25 years old, most students and faculty alike think I'm an undergraduate student. I do my work well, VERY WELL, get paid nothing even with a master's degree alright, act professionally, blog on the clock, dress the part, yada yada. So this just makes things 10x harder when students think it's OK to say, wow you're young - can I ask how old you are? When is that EVER appropriate?

This doesn't just happen at work. It's with strangers, it's with old friends... I feel like since I look young, am not married, and don't have kids, I'm not taken seriously as an adult. I do want that in my future, but does it have to be that I'm not treated as an adult because I'm not there yet?

When do you really start to feel/get treated as a grown up with a little respect and acceptance?

Milestones

At some point in life, you realize that you are at a different point in life than everyone else. Different experiences in jobs, relationships, school, and family all prepare us differently in how we approach life and what perspectives we take.

This week has been one of those milestones for me that recognizing your difference can actually help build better relationships. Understanding one another for each person's individual experiences can help you better predict or better accept one's words and actions. In a conversation with Dashing's sister, Miss E (read her blog at http://missesmisadventures.blogspot.com/), on Wednesday, we both have discovered that being in a committed relationship seems to calm to hunger for drama (ok, so in most cases). How is it that one piece of your life, a significant other, can change what kind of interactions you have with others? It's a unique puzzle to put together - trying to build a support system of friends that is - as we're all in different places, despite our ages being the same or not. As we further engage in conversations, experience new situations, and meet new people, our perspectives on life change. We come to expect more in some areas, demand less of other things, crave new things, and become in a hurry to dismiss others.

So the challenge presents when you are headed down the path of change to the north, while good friends are heading south. As peoples' interests and values change, can you accept them for who they are, or do break the bonds of friendship knowing that one day, your new experiences may return you to the same direction. I must believe that it is a harmony of the two - understanding each others' friendship needs and discovering who fulfills what and who doesn't. This goes hand in hand with understanding and accepting when your friends are in their own lives (their experiences and perspectives). In other words, don't expect a Ms. Dramamaniac to spend evenings watching old movies and talking about the meaning of life, and don't expect a Ms. Lifemeaning to want to listen to your 4 week old gossip. Know your friends by listening - hear where they are, and fulfill your friendship needs with what they can offer, while on the flip side knowing what they can't.