Words of Wisdom Wednesday

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READ:
Happiness is an Attitude, Not a Situation
Key to Happiness Lies in Attitude

Celebrate the Weekend in Style

Wishing you a wonderful weekend of smiles - the best accessory of all.

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Words of Wisdom Wednesday

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What are the odds?

This past Sunday was wonderful. I spent the morning at my favorite coffee/bakery shop listening to my audiobook on the patio enjoying the 70 degree sunny weather in Arizona. Then, Dashing finished his morning shift in the ICU, and we spent the rest of the day together. After lunch and a 6.5 mile jog through the desert, we landed back at our house for an evening in.

We decided to watch the movie 50/50 (the one with Seth Rogen about a friend having cancer). I've hesitated to see this movie. Since I've had my own cancer experience, I didn't know if I really felt like I could watch it.

However, it fit in the day perfectly and let me share my emotions with the one I love the most. Let me explain the connections:

1. In the same year I finished my cancer treatments of ABVD Chemotherapy and radiation, I ran a half-marathon. Yesterday, we ran 6.5 miles - my longest run since the race, and we went running only a few miles from the marathon track in Tucson (at the time of the 1/2, I lived in Phoenix).
2. I finished my cancer treatments this week in March, 2 years ago.
3. All of my chemotherapy treatments were in Tucson, we watched the movie in our new home in the Tucson area.
4. I watched it with my Dashing - who was there for me every step of the way.

Watching the movie  exposed so many feelings I hadn't addressed in a while. They rushed through my body like a dam breaking to release all of the tightly held rapids into the canal below.

Now, the story of 50/50 was not like my experience. My doctors were personable, concerned, supportive, kind, understanding. My family and friends were pillars of hope and strength, who surrounded me with love. In this movie, I felt like the patient was emotionally (and sometimes physically) alone. Dashing asked me during the movie, "You must have felt alone since you were the only one going through it, even with all of us around." I actually didn't. Although I had many moments of feeling like maybe not everyone really could understand, I can firmly say I never, ever felt alone. How lucky I was and am. Dashing then clasped his hand with mine and held me close for the rest of the night.

There was one clip in the movie that resonated so much with me though. It was near the end of the patient's chemotherapy treatments and he, after so many months of being stone cold, he broke down with tears, screams, and thrashing movements. I had this moment, and both the movie patient and I said "I'm so tired of being sick," while endless streams of tears ran down our faces with feelings of helplessness, vulnerability, and exhaustion.

So what moments in the movie stayed with me? (The moments that had me redirecting tears from my face to my sweatshirt sleeve).

• You sometimes feel like it will never end
• You stand in the bathroom contemplating how much to cut your hair, before and while it's falling out
• You don't really want to believe it could be the end of your life, and although it demonstrates positivity on the outside, on the inside it's refusing to figure our how you really feel ignoring mortality, sadness, or hurt. I did this too.
• You get tired of being sick
• You feel like  you're a burden
• You question who is truly there to support you
• You can shut people out easily because you're shutting down on the inside

So as parting words for the masses, I say this.... It is more than just ok to feel sad or hurt sometimes. Let yourself feel how you really feel. Come to terms with the fact that life is not always happy. You don't have to be "Suzy Sunshine." Sometimes things are hard, disappointing, tragic, and upsetting. Share those feelings just like you share the happy, elated, joyful ones. In that, you'll find the meaning of your life.

And They're Off - Celebrating Friendship

On Saturday, I had a wonderful time getting together with some inspirational ladies. It was my sorority, Delta Gamma's Founders Day. It's a day to celebrate the reason we share the bonds of friendship and sisterhood with members of Delta Gamma all around the world. It was a fantastic theme of Derby Days and we all wore dresses and hats to the beautiful outdoor brunch. My dear and talents friends Callie and Emily planned the day flawlessly!

Sara Cate and Callie - don't you love the hats! I found mine at an antique store.

Love these ladies! (you may recognize them all from my Sonoma Trip. Miss L is on the right.)

Not only was it great to see Delta Gamma collegians and alumni who have impacted my life in so many ways, but it was also a time to share what we mean to one another. Our speaker, Delta Gamma, Dr. Sue Stanek gave an eye-opening speech on friendships. It was so basic and clear, yet deep and moving. She shared how relationships vary, and we need to put time and effort into those relationships that serve as mentors and vital friends, not those who pull us down or take more than give. At the end of her speech, she called for all of us to think about what kind of friend others would call us in return. Check mate. That really called to my attention how I needed to evaluate my relationships AND myself. I encourage you to do the same.
Happy Friending!

Sincerely,
Sara Cate

Emily. Chair of the Event + comedic relief